Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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