Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
