just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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