do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
