New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
