i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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