Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
