he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize