Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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