So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
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I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
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I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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