I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
