never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
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So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
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