But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
