Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
