maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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