she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
