You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
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Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
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It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3