playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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