Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Acid is not a monday night drug
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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