glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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