did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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