It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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