I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.