I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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