i barfeds in our rink
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED