my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?