We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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