this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
