I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Randomize