Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize