he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
