just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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