Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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