I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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