your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
