the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
bring money and cleavage
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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