also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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