She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
