I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
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