I think I can smell my own vagina right now
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Terrible idea I love it
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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