Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
