I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I think my moral compass just broke
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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