I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just shotgunned beers for America
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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