On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize
