so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
