do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize