What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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