Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My first STD was from a foam party
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
