idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
