My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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