I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
