Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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