Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize